Another Glimpse into the Future

My dream and my work can be summed up in a few words Liberty, Love, Spirit and Soul. Lately, I have been fortunate enough to see a bit of Cavalia from the inside. I see the beautiful costumes and horses, the precision of the work and the talent of the 2 and 4 legged performers, but mostly the commitment of the trainers to treat and train with understanding, compassion and consideration for the horse. My heart aches for the chance to be right in the middle of it. Then I look in the mirror or photos at my torn blue jeans, make-up consisting of arena dirt and mud and I laugh and cry at the orphaned child of an image I must portray. I look at my amazingly lovely horse, but the gray and white of his coat and tail often match my make-up. He is often a lovely shade of brown or green.

At first it didn't matter to me. After all, it matters little to the horse. I always thought that if I appeared larger than life, then clients would be too intimidated to look to me to guidance. Perhaps I miss the mark, perhaps not. Whatever the reason, it has stopped me from moving further until I figure at least some part of it out.

What I am finding is that in whatever direction I turn to help the horse and their human partners, something is missed in the presentation, the communication, the feel with the human....something. I am pretty sure my communication with the horse is spot on most of the time. I have been trying to figure it out, but like many others that do similar work to what I do, it is almost impossible to convey the feeling and the knowledge. I can give a performance that wows the students, but how does that help them? It is great for my ego and Fable seems to enjoy it; master that he is. The best I can do is guide others to to the place where the spark can be ignited and thus begin their journey....and I refuse to give up or give in. It is possible. If it is possible for one human, it is possible for all. I don't mean that to sound cliche; it makes sense from a scientific perspective.

When I say feeling, I must admit that part of that is about the concept of feel , but not entirely. I have been working at taking the mystery out of that concept for a couple of years now. I think I have finally found a solution in a combination of hands on work and written word that has gotten pretty good result. If the emails and "thank yous" can be considered a measure, then I am on the right track.

Ah,the childhood dream to run away and join the circus. However, the circus I want to join is no circus at all, but a group of artists, professionals and like minded souls who truly understand and acknowledge their own humanity and consider the horse first and foremost. The next question is how do you create something like that and ask a horse to travel from city to city, town to town, and still preserve their sanity and well being? It is a big question. That is why I don't travel far with my troop of 2.

What bothers me most is the misuse, misguided and misinterpretation of liberty work that is out there in the form of cookie-cutter and paint-by-number methods offered to the every day horse owner via DVD and manual and the professional performance troops that cover their ineptitude and cruelty with flashy costuming, bright lights, music and pretty, but miserable horses. The general public or every day horse owner doesn't know the difference, why would they?

So here we are...left to find a way and to figure it out. Every day I get a bit closer to the truth, with my horse as my tireless teacher and me as his human guide.